Dear Guruji,
This is how we address each other, albeit the difference in height, knowledge, experience, stature - every aspect remarkably varied. Our mutual friend shared the worst possible news, that you had not been with us since Jan. It has been 3 hours, I am sitting here and wondering what has hit me. Only consoling thing is that I had taken the opportunity to speak to you recently and was happy to know that how satisfied you are and enjoying the retired life. You retired ahead of the usual traditional retirement age, just that very act defines you.
How do I label our association? I know that I am your disciple - but you treated me like a brother, friend and at times you would turn around and say - "ennamolam solreenga and I am learning new things from you…(still can hear your voice with Kannada accented Tamil & English). I would shrug as usual and say you are the Guru - the teacher. You would laugh it off.
I always look back at my decision to come back from The US in 2001 and see that as one of the best decisions in my life; everyone wanted to stay and carry on the American dream. I came back for many reasons. If I hadn't, I would have never met a soft-giant like you. I always used to tease you a 7 foot 'small' man (as that I is how you referred yourself always). Wholly unassuming, humble and soft spoken man that you are, would never flash your credentials or knowledge and wisdom. We bonded through a pre-sales project, that we named as RAW-B. Everyone thought that we were working on some top secret project for the 'RAW'.
When I came back from US, the company had grown and become completely unidentifiable. So when I felt out of place, you had taken me under your wings with no expectations in return. Only when our mutual friend TS shared your credentials, I did come to know about your background and the stature. I strongly think because of your unassuming nature and the simple ways, our friendship had grown very strong. If I had known about your true value, may be I would have backed off in respect.
You never cared for money, fame or titles; you created the next version of me and a large part of what I am today. You treated people as they are, remained curious always, worked passionately, never to please anyone including yourself and that success would automatically follow; in fact not to label 'success' was your mantra! When we won the $5M dollar sale, I remember well that we were not rewarded as we should have been.
Typical of my old self, I was in a rebellious mood but as ever, you calmed me down with a dose of Karma theory. Subsequently Karma caught up and we laughed about it…
one of the best things to happen during that period was the time we spent together to publish our own work together on a technical paper - my second publication, but the first of its kind given the wider audience reach.
Among the many interests that we shared, passion for food is something that we truly relished. I remember how we used to find new restaurants every week in some nook and corner to try different flavours. Of course, how could I forget the best bisi-bele bath that your missus made for us. You had requested her to make a special bisi-bele just for me and the flavour still lingers.
Our in-person friendship was short-lived, as I moved to UK in 2003, however it grew through emails, forwards and occasional phone calls. Only once we had shared a bit of despondent mood about how the company we worked for treated you! Apart from that it was always high spirited, fun, teasing conversation and something to learn from you. I fondly remember how you had written to me in 2016 in a child-like manner at the occasion of your book on Data Privacy publication.
I am unable to convert the feelings into words about our relationship and the time we spent together. The late nights we used to spend together in discussing project design, that always veered into philosophy, corporate culture, capitalism, politics, cricket, food and at times about your boys all remain deeply etched in my mind.
One of my recent best decisions was to call quite a few people from our old gang (due to lockdown) and of course you were one of the first people that I reached out. The child like tone & joy was still in there in your voice.
I can hear your voice and the words that you had chosen to retire early, contended, happy and turned your daily routine to write your books etc. I was extremely happy for you and shared gratitude in shaping my life. I shared my experiences and what I had achieved and the types of things I had done. You were so glad for my experiences too. I remember you called me to visit you and that we could have longer hours of discussions with nothing to worry about. I was eagerly waiting for that, but you took off after a contended life - but, you had promised me a chat and bisi-bele.
I miss you guruji. I am sure you would be smiling and dismissing my sentimental mood and chide me gently. Somehow I was able to call you just a couple of weeks before your parting especially on your birthday and exchange my wishes. Had I known, that would have been our last call, I wonder how and what we would have discussed it? You would still be dismissive and looking forward to that as an adventure.
Many may come in one's life and go, but only a few like you that come, decorate, embellish and remain for ever.
Guruji to quote you "Live humbly, there are great people around us, let us learn!"
